Wednesday, 13 July 2011

Stag Night – The Movie!

As if having your balls-out stag night antics posted on Facebook wasn’t glory enough, the evolution of sophisticated functions on our smart phones means that the unbelievable events of your whole stag do could be immortalised in a technicolour production to rival ‘The Hangover’ parts 1 and 2, and uploaded for the whole world to enjoy. YouTube has a lot to answer for.

So, our advice is; make it worth watching.

Every good movie, sorry stag do, needs a balance of memorable laugh-out-loud and air-punching moments. Stag nights need to be remembered for more than how many yards of ale were consumed and the whole stag party needs a bit of a script, direction and a loose plot.

These days stag dos can be as wild as you like, if you can handle it (Ooh, did we throw down a little challenge there?). Our repertoire of, shall we say ‘exotic’ activities, are expanding all the time. A quick bite to eat will never be the same after you’ve licked and sucked it off a stunning naked woman lying across your table in Tallin.

The summer temperatures will rise to new heights (and that’s not all) on a stag night at Hooters in Bristol or Nottingham; get up close and personal with a lap dance anywhere between Bratislava and Brighton and just let your love flow with a guided tour and VIP entry into Amsterdam’s red lights district and top venues.

But hey, don’t forget, every good movie and, in reality stag party, needs a little more than just gratuitous sex…erm, yes it does, think logically, you’re getting married. Far be it from us to encourage the groom to stray, in fact the above was all for the single stags’ benefit, one has to try and please all parties. Besides, this blockbuster needs a bit of hardcore action of the more physically active kind.

Hmm, not that kind, move on for goodness sake, we’re talking James Bond style – that’s not helping is it! Look, we, and the world, want to see you screaming down the bob sleigh in the Baltics, manically Blowkarting (sand yachting) in Holland, smugly surviving the Lazer Combat in Cheltenham. This is what stag dos are all about and you’re the leading man. Come out smelling of victory instead of cheap perfume.

Whoever the director of this Oscar winning epic is going to be, make sure that your stag do makes the final cut.

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