What Is The Role Of The Best Man?

It's all very well being asked to be Best Man, and most Best Men bite the Groom's hand off when asked. It's recognition of the friendship you have. However once you've sobered up and the dust has settled, it will suddenly dawn on you that actually you have a responsibility and that question will come up "what is the role of the best man?".

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Below we have put together Best Man Roles and Responsibilities. Please note; some are labelled "traditional" as these roles may be outdated so take with a pinch of salt.

Before The Wedding

Help Choose The Right Attire

Usually you're given a colour scheme to work with, making the Ushers, Best Man, Bridesmaids, Groom and Bride look co-ordinated. You also need to decide on cufflinks, shoes and most importantly the hip flasks!

Get The Ushers To The Suit Fittings

It's your job to make sure the ushers turn up for fittings. You may only need a couple of fittings, one for measurements and the other to try on the suit. Set up a Groomsmen WhatsApp group with all the information on so everyone knows what they are doing and where they are going.

Organise The Stag Do (Bucks Party)

This goes without saying, I expect the first thought when you were asked to be best man was "right, where are we going on the stag do then?!"

The Wedding

The Night Before The Wedding

This is an important tradition. The Groom must not see the Bride the night before the wedding. In fact he cannot see her until she glides down that aisle. So you, as best man, must stay with him the night before the wedding, look after him and make sure he doesn't do a runner!

Collect & Read Out The Telegrams (Traditional)

In the old days when a close family member or friend couldn't make the big day they would send a Telegram. These messages would include a congratulations to the bride and groom and usually include a witty message or two.

These days it's more than likely you'll be reading out emails and usually you read these out before your big speech.

Button Holes

If you don't know what button holes are, have a word with yourself and then make sure all the groomsmen, including the groom, have one.

The Rings

Whatever happens DO NOT FORGET THE RINGS. It's your main job, well apart from the roles mentioned above and below! 

Witness The Wedding

Obviously you're going to witness the wedding but you may have to stick pen to paper saying you were there. The best man isn't always asked to witness the wedding it could be a job delegated to one or two members of the congregation.

Organise The Guest Photographs

The wedding photographer is going to have his hands full making sure he gets the right shots, so it's down to you to make sure you have the right people, in the right place, at the right time. This can also be delegated out to the ushers as well.

Master Of All Ceremonies

If there isn't a "Master Of Ceremonies" or a "Toastmaster" it's down to the best man to fill that void. You'll need to be ready to announce key parts of the wedding day which include; the bride and groom's arrival into the wedding breakfast, the cake cutting, first dance, speeches etc.

The Speech

If you've never stood up in front of lots of people before this is the best time to do it, everybody will be on your side but that doesn't mean you can do a bad job, take days, even weeks preparing your best man's speech, you don't want to let the groom or yourself down now, do you?

Dance With The Chief Bridesmaid (Traditional)

This is a very traditional role however it's a must. Usually, this dance is after the bride and groom's first dance. On your behalf I hope she's nice and you get on well, just don't tread on her feet.


You may also like our post on 10 Best Man Top Tips.


Two facts you may want to make reference to in your speech:

How The Best Man Came About

Back in medieval times in Germany, it was always customary to marry someone in your community however if the ladies were in short supply you would have to look further afield.

Now in those days you couldn't meet a girlfriend on Tinder or down the local boozer so you had to go into neighbouring villages and kidnap a fair maiden, now this is a two man operation, hence why you'd need a best man.

A Weird Wedding Tradition Not Appropriate Today

In medieval times in England and France the witnesses would stand over the bed and once the wedding had been consummated the witnesses would check, this was called fingering the stocking!

Luckily, this tradition died in medieval times!

Whatever happens, have a good one and good luck!

M.